He shrugged.

Tell me a joke, Missandei of Naath. Ed: I bought the world’s worst thesaurus yesterday. My dad would wait till she had put it on her nightstand and say, “Do you want to go to sleep or what?” Not being able to hear, she would inevitably respond with “What?” And that, my dad joked to me on numerous occasions, is the explanation for why I come from a very large family. Then he remembered what I’d said and confidently called out, “Acura!” —Linda Price My husband can’t activate our Amazon Echo, because he keeps forgetting its name, Alexa. M., via rd.com I was admiring my aunt’s necklace when she surprised me by announcing, “I’m leaving it to you in my will.” I was overjoyed, perhaps too much. The next time he wanted to use our new toy, he looked a bit puzzled. My daughter is now a college graduate and lives out of state, but every time I cross those tracks, I think of her. —Submitted by Alex Del Bene Two guys stole a calendar. We call him the Village Idiom.

So what’s the Wi‑Fi password? When I was 12, he took me to a Chicago White Sox game with a group from a local tavern.

It’s National Joke Day, and your cheesy, mostly funny Assistant has a few jokes up its sleeve. Ed: Not only is it awful, it’s awful.

The fact that he’d been dead for 40 years didn’t sway her. I started: “I’d hire a cook so that I could just say, ‘Hey, make me a sandwich!’” Thomas shook his head.

... dairyman be a cowboy?

“No, I... My dad and uncles were all in the Army during wartime, but only two of the three served overseas. —Albert Sloan Teaching is not for sensitive souls.

If we leave them out on the counter, people just come in and take them.” —James Nealis Traveling through the Midwest, I stopped at an Ohio welcome center to pick up a state map.

With Tenor, maker of GIF Keyboard, add popular Please Tell Me A Joke animated GIFs to your conversations. The first day on the job, he opens his lunch box and mumbles, “Oh no, peanut butter!” The next day, “Peanut butter again!” This goes on for days, until another worker says, “Why don’t you ask your wife to make a different lunch?” Joe replies, “I’m not married. Free Version loads banner ads and interstitial ads between activities. Exasperated, the customer glared at me and said, “In my newspaper, the ad was for this store!” —Edward Oppenheimer A customer walked into my clothing shop and asked to see the pants that were advertised in the paper that day. Kate Whittington So what’s the Wi‑Fi... After a health scare, I hugged my wife and whispered, “If something happens to me, the presents in my closet are yours.” She whispered back, “If anything happens to you, everything in your closet is mine.” —Dean Simpson After a health scare, I hugged my wife and whispered, “If something happens to me, the presents in my closet are yours.” She whispered back, “If anything happens to you,... Our boatswain's mate was a smoker who would toss his matches overboard.

By Okay, please tell me that this is a joke, that the real vineyard's somewhere else. 01-04-2018 08:37 PM. On Dad’s first day, the friend took him to the production line where he would be working.

—David Bez Traveling through the Midwest, I stopped at an Ohio welcome center to pick up a state map. A manager leaped to his feet to ask, “Shouldn’t there be a hyphen between nit and picking?” —E. There was only one, and it was from him: “I’m on my way, and I have your phone.” —Michelle Steinmetz On the way to meet my husband at a restaurant, I realized that I didn’t have my phone and immediately panicked. Then one day in a men’s room, a man walked out of a stall. One day, convinced he could improve things, he told the head cook, “If you give me a paring knife, I could peel these potatoes faster.” The cook turned slowly to my father and said, “Son, you’re in the Army. Tell Me a Joke (Paid) is an Android app loads jokes from Google Cloud Endpoint and uses a separate java library to display the jokes. She discovered that Mike O’Malley was leaving for America and asked Mike to look for Timmy and tell him to write to her. Display setup with button to show punchline; Show punchline with capability to show another; See other branches for more versions. As we reached a red light, he pointed to the box. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.

Autocorrect can go straight to he’ll. Heck, feel free to dance if mood takes you that way. We take the best jokes and give them to you on audio, just click and feel free to laugh.

The band was Hall & Oates, and this gag perfectly sums up my father’s sense of humor.

“You know, I always used to wish I could whistle,” he said. I grew up hearing my dad tell a joke about a Mrs. Dunn, whose son, Timmy Dunn, had left Ireland for America, never to be heard from again.

The customer,... “Yesterday was my 18th birthday!” a customer said after walking into our convenience store. Nicole Fornabaio/rd.com. The first day on the job, he opens his lunch box and mumbles, “Oh no,... One night, the phone rang, and Dad answered it. © 2013-2020 Reverso Technologies Inc. All rights reserved.Ces exemples peuvent contenir des mots vulgaires liés à votre rechercheCes exemples peuvent contenir des mots familiers liés à votre recherche

One participant complained about management’s tendency to interfere and wrote the word nitpicking.

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